Modern Day Superhero

Individuals who quote well known people make me think that they have nothing interesting to say.

Fortunately, I never have a deficit in that area.

Getting out of treatment definitely opened my eyes to endless possibilities. Maybe the vet major isn't the best thing? Maybe writing isn't the best thing? Teaching? Shit. I'm lost again. It seems like anything concrete I had in my thoughts as future plans has completely dissipated.

But it's okay. I like it this way better.

There is an exuberance that comes with being a little lost that people, who have known about their future from the day they were potty trained, do not really experience. Well, at least I know I didn't till about recently. I always worked towards being a Vet knowing thats all I wanted to do.

Weeeeell, here are a few things I never took into account:
1. Falling in love. Oh yeah. That was something that I never really thought would happen. I thought I would marry my career. Fortunately a beautiful curly blonde haired cherub came along and stole my heart. His name is Martin. It's been 13.5 months (definitely a record).

2. Wanting to travel and document the world. Martin is a photographer, I love writing. This brings us to issue number:

2.5 I REALLY WANT TO WRITE. And possibly teach. But definitely write.

3. I am so sick of thinking FOR other people. I want to think for myself. I don't know whether I want to regurgitate books my whole life and possibly not get into vet school.

But WHAT i am trying to communicate is.. I don't care. For once. I don't CARE! I just know there's someone I want to be with and I've got mad skills at whatever I put my mind to (as long as computers aren't involved). So my grandmaster plan is:

Do everything.

Looking back I've always done that anyway. Riding Swimming Ballet (and sometimes I did all of these in ONE day because I cannot sacrifice) Debate etc etc etc. So WHY not do everything? Why have a completely steady job?

Basically, apply to grad school EVERYWHERE for everything! So for me: neuroscience, vet med, english (with an emphasis on creative writing). And see what takes me. That's what i'll do first. And then after that, i'll go back a few years later and do something else. And possibly a PHD in another one. I'm going to be a modern day superhero.

Something interesting I found out is that Khaled Hosseini (the author of a thousand splendid suns and the kite runner) is actually a physician in LA. See, he's doing it all. Except traveling. So i'll one up him. And then i'll meet him.

I have way too many good ideas and I can't just swallow them I have to find a way to execute them. So this is how i'll do it. Whether it's in research (science) or writing or whatever. But really, I feel more alive than I have in a while (we can also contribute that feeling to being in treatment) but I would like to think it's more of a spiritual awakening. I don't feel so caged. I just feel... free.

And maybe that's because i've had way too much caffeine today.