I don't understand the dynamics of sexism.
Well, I do, since I choose not to use gender specific labels (i.e gf, bf), but I don't understand it in terms of music.
Looking at it this way, each female musician is associated with a male musician: Missy Elliot and Timbaland. Mary J Blige and Notorious. Yoko and John. Though Yoko is just... well... Yoko.
Anyhoo, yesterday was my test spin at Fridas (a local mexican restaurant turned dance club post 9 pm) with DJ Brook (local madison DJ who is totally awesome and teaches me as much as he can) and I spun from 10 - 12, and then 1.10-1.40am. So, when I went back up there to spin my second set (which I ANNIHILATED btw, and Marty told me so so that means I actually did well) but when I was up there, before I went on, I felt an ass grab. Ahem? That belongs to someone, sorry. But I kind of shooed whoever it was away and was rocking out by the decks (turntables) waiting for 1.10 am (it was like.. 1.07) but i felt a shoulder tap and Sir Assgrabber decided to try to kiss me and twirl me around so that my ba-donk-a-donk was grinding on his crotch. Seriously? No no honey bunches of oats, i'm not a groupie. I'm the mutha-fuckin' DJ.
I got cocky-ish. Pushed him away when I found out what he really wanted to do, and walked over to the decks and decided to tear it up.. Which I did. But the look on his face... P.r.i.c.e.l.e.s.s.
The thing about being a DJ with a Vagine is that most people try to book you for your image. I DJed a fashion show the day before in a bikini (the theme was south beach) and I realize that fashion shows are for the IMAGE so yeah I had to fit the theme but if youre going to hire me, I really hope it's for my skill and not my ta-tas (which are kind of non-existant anyway). But the problem is, I like to dress well when I go out, so yeah, you're guaranteed a well dressed DJ but please... PLEASE.. book me for my skill.. because I CAN spin.
Trying to combat this perception of looks before skill has been the hardest thing so far. I started in september. Bought my equiptment in november. And Brook had told me that i'm going to get alot of shit for being a girl aaaaaaaaand he was right.
"You just got booked because you're a girl"
"She's a girl and it distracts if she beatmatches wrong" (ahem, i barely beatmatch wrong)
and the most annoying annoying ANNOYING one
"Omg, you're so hot" Hello, would you like to comment on my spinning?????? Bitch. But thank you, really. You can thank my parents actually and hopefully get a somewhat disturbing mental image.
And no, just because I hang out with the other DJs who are all men does not mean i'm sleeping with them to get to the top. It means i'm learning from them. Sure, the men are my mentors, but that doesn't mean I am affiliated with them?? Nor am I two steps behind them. I learn from the best, they happen to be the best here.
The problem is, I think we all have the same music? Marty and I were talking about this yesterday night. He said that to warm up, I should play things people haven't heard since not many people are there early anyway. But he was talking about my mixing and how it's so much different than the generic DJ mixing style because I experiment (which is a HUGE compliment coming from him).
And the difference between me and DJ mia (oldschool 90s madison DJ) is that I am not a diva, and when I trainwreck a beatmatch on a track, I don't shake my tits.. I work on it.
Remember, a good drop is always better than a bad mix.
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I completely agree with you... and sympathize. Women are sexualized no matter what profession, hobby, or talent they persue. Because we live in a world run by greedy, immature men who just want us to shake our tits and stay "in our place" (i.e. below them, both literally and metaphorically). Sorry you had to deal with such a douchetard. If I were still there, I would've grabbed him by the balls and asked him how it felt. Had a lot of fun with you Saturday. What's the plan for this weekend? :)
ReplyDeleteI 50% agree with you. Women are sometimes objectified and it can be super demeaning and frustrating. BUT you can use it to get an edge in a fickle image-obsessed industry. As long as your gender and your looks don't define you, then think of it simply as a marketing tool that you don't have to pay for. Ugly dudes with amazing skills get passed over and that creates a certain amount of unfounded bitterness. "Unfounded" because bookers care about image and we all have to deal with that. Remember that dude samantha ronson? She had to get a chick to make her famous.
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